Italy

Secondly in Group C we come to reigning World Champions and fair-play specialists, the stylish sophisticates of Italy.

Italy

Official coach slogan - The sky is always bluer!

Unofficial coach slogan - The Azzuri always win when the year ends in scandal.

Coached by the surprise choice to replace the experienced World Cup winning Marcello Lippi, prematurely greying ex-midfield tyro Roberto Donnadoni, the Italians will be one of the red hot favourites for EURO 2008 glory, despite being reacquainted with France and thrust into the GROUP OF DEATH also containing the dangerous Dutchies and the ruthless Romanians.

The spawny Italian's will be hoping to repeat their success in this tournament from 40 years ago, when they fluked their way past the Russians in the semi-final by winning on the toss of a coin and prevailed in the final only after a replay against the Yugoslavians.

Defensive masters, they will be disappointed to have lost captain and spiritual leader, Fabio Cannevaro to an ankle injury, and so may be forced to play a slightly more expansive game, although probably not, especially with thuggish enforcer "Rhino" Gattuso protecting the back four.

With the retirement of Francesco Totti ("he looks like a little tw*t" - Ron Atkinson), much will be expected, creatively, of Milan's Andrea Pirlo, who's defence splitting passes and accurate freekicks were a highlight of the last World Cup.

Upfront the Italians have the experience of Alessandro Del Piero, who will most likely be brought off the bench if big lump, Luca Toni, fails to batter his way through the opposition's rearguard alongside belmfaced self-wedgie giver, Antonio Cassano.

TC's prediction - Italy will be there or thereabouts come the final reckoning, possibly losing in a semi-final shootout with Del Piero doing a Roberto Baggio and blasting the final spotkick into orbit.

Player who's surname most sounds like a type of pasta - Sampdoria striker, Fabio Quagliarella.